Leaving Asia

You roll through the Malaysian mountains and your eyes try to take in every crevice, every hollow and dip in the cliffs. The mountains are nothing like the mountains in Alaska, but nonetheless they remind you of that place you once called home. You had talked about those mountains the other day with a friend, had remembered how every day the view as you came down from the hill where you lived took your breath away, and asked if the ocean still did the same for him day after day, and he said it did.

The father of another friend had asked about your travels, about the places that most amazed you, if there was a place where you said to yourself, "This is the place; this is it." And you thought about it, you tried to find an answer.

You had said no, had said that if you felt that way, you would still be in that place, wherever it was.

But here you are again, on the move. You've put one woman onto a boat heading north when you were heading south, the same woman who knew where she was going but also told you don't follow. You've said goodbye to your friends and said I'll see you again. And you believe it, really you do, because, well, you sort of need to.

And those hills rolling past, they are beautiful, truly, and you know there's so much more to see out there, and you know you will keep moving, because that's also something that you sort of need to do.

The world is probably the same as it was a week ago. You were younger then, slightly, still lingering in the end of your third decade. The world's the same now but maybe you feel a little different, feel like you need a plan, right, something concrete. But all you can really think about is what next? You've haven't always been the greatest at moving on, but you're getting better, because that too is something that needs to be done. And the road keeps opening up in front of you.

And that what next is waiting somewhere down that road, a road that, to you, is as much a real road as a metaphor, and you'll deal with that when the need arises. And for today, at least, the road ends with a night's sleep, but you also know that when you lay your head to rest the next night, your world will have completely changed again. But you are ready.

***

I'm in a little guest house in Kuala Lumpur called the Bird Nest. They've named all of the rooms after birds. It's not the greatest place in the world, but it's cheap and will do for the five hours of sleep I'm going to try to get tonight before heading to the airport. I've spent all day on buses and trains, and tomorrow I'll be in the air all day, but hopefully there is a delicious Guinness waiting for me at the end.